Whew chile…..
It has been too long since I’ve been able to put together a blog post. Our last post was February 10th and since February, it honestly feels like time has been in a constant state of warp speed and slow motion. Shortly after our last blog post, we entered a global pandemic of epic proportions. I recall attending a conference at the end of February, right before things began to shut down. I was so concerned about returning to North Carolina, putting out the next post, tackling a project at work, planning for my next International trip, and then…..we were in a global pandemic. Something that I’d never considered would occur in my lifetime…life as I knew it, as we knew it, as the world knew it—changed.
Fake it Til You Make It
Once the news broke, I began working remotely from home full-time. The first few weeks were great! Waking up at the edge of go time. Air frying chicken wings for lunch, saving hundreds on gas…that ended up spent on groceries, impulsive online shopping sprees and the overpriced toilet paper and cleaning supplies. I couldn’t see my family. I couldn’t travel. Businesses were closing and friends and family members were furloughed or lost their jobs altogether. Zoom meetings and happy hours became the norm and I almost thought I’d be able to handle this thing. After all, it was only going to last until the summer right?
Wrong. In the midst of this life altering global public health crisis, the summer proved to push us (here in the United States) to the edge of what we had began to know of as reality. Beginning in February, the very public and racially motivated murders of Ahmad Aubrey (February 23), Breonna Taylor (March 13), Daniel Prude (March 22), George Floyd (May 25), Rayshard Brooks (June 12), one-year anniversaries of the killings of De’Von Bailey (August 3, 2019) and Elijah McCain (August 24, 2019), Dijon Kizzee (August 31), Deon Kay (September 2) and what happened to Deja Stallings (September 30)…despicable.
Not to mention Neo-Confederate, ‘Back the Blue’ rallies and protests across the country in counter-protest of the anti-racism and police brutality protests that contributed to the continued strain on our nation and communities across the country. Being Black and female and the aunt to 5 amazing Black boys and 2 extraordinary Black girls, I had to have conversations that I’d never thought I’d have to have. Conversations about why people who don’t look like us hate us. Why people kill people who look like us and never face justice. Why our past and present is put on trial even once we’ve been executed and are no longer here to defend ourselves…or our right to exist.
I would be remiss not to add that there is an entire trope of people in this country who have deemed mask wearing and public health precautions as political and wish to exercise their right not to wear masks . Large and small businesses shutting down. Corporations going bankrupt. An economy on the brink of disaster. Illuminating health disparities related to COVID-19 and economic challenges related to the likelihood that those most impacted by this pandemic are Black and/or Indigenous Persons of Color (BIPOC). Evictions and foreclosures galore due to people not being able to go to work, earn money, pay rent, etc. Oh wait, we did get $1,200 from the government that I’m assuming was supposed to handle all of that over this past 8 months….
Everyday I logged into work. Everyday I compartmentalized my frustration, distrust, disgust and anger. Everyday I had to 'fake it til I made it’. I completed work tasks, excelled really. Took on more clients than I ever had (I mean we’ve only been around 1 year). Published, because that’s what one must do as an academic (wink). And I made it…barely. All in the midst of a global pandemic.
You Suffer Me, I Don’t Suffer You…
Now we’re in October…the 8th month of quarantine/pandemic life and it’s an election year **insert Black female shaking my head emoji**. Ridiculousness at every turn and at this point, nothing surprises me anymore. Nothing. And that’s sad. In addition to the presidential election, we have a gubornatorial election in my state as well as seats open for local, state and federal government. Everyone and everything is under a microscope. And we’re still in the middle of a pandemic!
September was Suicide Prevention Month and now that we’re in October, Breast Cancer Awareness Month, Domestic Violence Awareness Month and coming up on World Mental Health Day (October 10), it’s important to take stock of our physical and mental health as we navigate this treacherous terrain. Let me start by saying: no one has all of the answers. No one. But I do think that we can all be a little more reflective and intentional about our physical and mental health in a positive way during this very difficult time. How do we do that? I don’t know. What do you do Dr. J? Glad you asked:
Discover new artists and listen to music
Take long walks at one of the many local greenways and/or trails
Head to the lake for an early morning hike
Tend to my many houseplants (I have 5 orchids and a host of assorted aroids including a Thai Constellation monstera)
I’ve been encouraged by all of the creativity that the pandemic has birthed for not only small business owners, but also for those who are finding new ways to spend their alone time and invigorate their minds. Art, music, culture, emphasis on Black owned businesses and creating inclusive and equitable spaces for people of color. I’ve been intentionally spending quality time with friends and family in socially distanced environments; keeping my phone face down or in my bag and enjoying undivided social interaction with others. I’ve made new friends on Twitter and in real life. I’ve perfected my vegan chocolate chip cookies, learned all about Tiger’s milk and the perfect ceviché, cooked just about any and everything that you can imagine in my air fryer and became a Trader Joe’s seasonal stalker. It hasn’t been all bad.
Ladies, How Ya’ll Feel? Fellas, Ya’ll Alright?
So what is the point of this post? Well, I was up and couldn’t sleep. I needed an outlet for my thoughts and ideas. I figured I’d get this blog train back rolling since I find myself journaling a lot more these days. But you know what, I get tired of laughing at my own jokes. You all deserve nice things too. I guess I’m here to let you know that I’m still here. Still around, still making moves, still leading.
Peace, love and GO VOTE!